Thursday, December 29, 2011

"Warrior" Review

SPOILERS MAKE ME WANT TO PUNCH SOMETHING. THIS IS A SPOILER WARNING.

    I do not like sports. I understand why others like them. It's just that the same thrill most people get from sports I can get just as much if not more from movies, without having to give up 4 hours of my day to watch them. The fact that I don't like sports makes the fact that I absolutely love sport films all the more confusing. I, like most people love a good underdog story. So, where does Warrior, which came out this past September and I am now reviewing on DVD, stack up against the great underdog movies like Miracle or Field of Dreams? Let's find out.


Saturday, December 24, 2011

Christmas Special: Little Drummer Boy Review

    Ah, the holidays are almost here. The season of joy, giving and Christmas cheer. Carols get us into the spirit. Leave it the Bieber to make us hear it. He's made an album of Christmas wonder. He won't let things like skill or talent steal his thunder. Off this album comes a cover. Of Little Drummer Boy, as we discover. With Busta Ryhmes helping to spread the joy. Trust me, I'll try not to be coy. I vowed to in this review not to be spiteful. Oh, oh, how delightful.

Monday, December 19, 2011

The Second Trailer Rises

With the 6-minute IMAX prolouge to next years The Dark Knight Rises released before Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol, it's only fitting that the new, second trailer for the movie has been released. And this time it isn't just a clip of Gordon that we can't understand. It's a clip of Bane that we can't understand. Oh, and action. Lots of action.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

2011- 2012 TV Season Review: Week 13

SCORES:
Once Upon a Time- "The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter"- 6 out of 6
Terra Nova- "Within"- 4 out of 6
Fear Factor- 3 out of 6
Glee- "Extraordinary Merry Christmas"- 5 out of 6
New Girl- "The 23rd"- 6 out of 6
Raising Hope- "It's a Hopeful Life"- 4 out of 6
Psych- "Niel Simon's Lover's Retreat"- 6 out of 6
The Mentalist- "Fugue in Red"- 4 out of 6
Chuck- "Chuck Versus the Curse"- 5 out of 6
Grimm- "Let Your Hair Down"- 4 out of 6

BEST/WORST:
Best of the Week: New Girl (Great episode I'll watch every Christmas)
Worst of the Week- Fear Factor (It's back. Does anyone care?)

TV NEWS:
- Sarah Palin wants a tv show. Because one crappy one wasn't enough!

- The Golden Globes continue to make bad choices.

- Nothing to do woth TV but how awesome was the G.I. Joe: Retailiation trailer?

See you later

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

2011- 2012 TV Season Review: Week 12

SCORES:
Once Upon a Time- "The Shepard"- 5
How I Met Your Mother- "Symphony of Illumination"- 4
Castle- "Cuffed"- 5
Glee- "Hold On to Sixteen"- 4
New Girl- "Bad in Bed"- 5
Raising Hope- "The Men of New Natesville"- 6
Euerka- "Do You See What I See"- 3
Warehouse 13- "The Greatest Gift"- 6
Psych- "The Tao of Gus"- 6
The Big Bang Thoery- "The Speckerman Recurrence"- 4
Community- "Regional Holiday Music"- 4
Chuck- "Chuck vs the Hack-Off"- 5
Grimm- "Danse Macabre"- 5
Grimm- "The Three Bad Wolves"- 6

WINNERS AND LOSERS:
Best of the Week: Warehouse 13
Worst of the Week: Eureka

Sunday, December 11, 2011

"Wild Wild West" Review

   SPOILER WARNING. NOT THAT YOU SHOULD CARE.

    Every now and again a movie is able to stand the test of time. A select few movies, capable of be being just as good, if not better, then when it first came out. The Godfather is still making us an offer we can't refuse. Back to the Future is still taking us through time. Ghostbusters still has us asking who we're gonna call. So, does Wild Wild West stand the test of time. Why, yes it's still god awful. Thank you for asking.


Thursday, December 8, 2011

NEW SERIES: Modern Art: Episode 1: Vanilla Extract

I know I have been a slacker lately due to the holiday and a major school project I have to finish. However to make it up to you guys, how about I introduce an all new bi-weekly series. Sound good? Good. Without further ado, here's Modern Art, Episode 1!

Sunday, December 4, 2011

2011-2012 TV Season Review: Weeks 10 and 11

Scores:
Week 10:
The Walking Dead: "Secrets"- 4 out of 6
How I Met Your Mother- "The Rebound Girl"- 5 out of 6
Terra Nova- "Vs."- 5 out of 6
Castle- "Kill Shot"- 4 out of 6
Week 11:
Once Upon a Time- "That Still Small Voice"- 6 out of 6
The Walking Dead- "Pretty Much Dead Already"- 5 out of 6
Terra Nova- "Now You See Me"- 5 out of 6
Glee- "I Kissed a Girl"- 6 out of 6
New Girl- "Bells"- 4 out of 6
Raising Hope - "Bro-Gurt"- 5 out of 6
Psych- "In For a Penny..."- 5 out of 6
Community- "Foosball and Nocturnal Vigilantism"- 4 out of 6
Bones- "The Male in the Mail"- 5 out of 6
Supernatural- "Death's Door"- 6 out of 6

Weekly Overview:
These past two weeks have overall been good ones. Week 10's best was HIMYM, while it's weakest was Castle's disappointing episode. Week 11 had way more to choose from. For the best Once Upon a Time, Glee and Supernatural all had fantastic episodes, but in the end, Supernatural wins Best of the Week. For worst, while neither of these episode were really bad, both New Girl's and Community's newest episode were pretty weak. In the end though, Community win Weakest of the Week.

Best Moments:
- HIMYM's extremely shocking ending.

- The Walking Dead's extremely shocking ending.

- William Shatner's still awesome.

- That trip through Bobby's head was one I'd gladly take again.

Worst Moments:
- The Farming Dead is now offically a more appropriate title for The Walking Dead.

TV News:
- The Munsters are offically coming to NBC. Again.

- Hugh Laurie plans to retire from TV after House.

- The Walking Dead has gone on break until Feburary.

See you later

Sunday, November 20, 2011

2011- 2012 TV Season Review: Week 9

Scores:
Once Upon a Time- "The Price of Gold"- 5 out of 6
The Walking Dead- "Chupacabra"- 5 out of 6
How I Met Your Mother- "Tick Tick Tick..."- 6 out of 6
Terra Nova- "Proof"- 4 out of 6
Glee- "Mash Off"- 5 out of 6
New Girl- "Thanksgiving"- 5 out of 6
Raising Hope- "Burt's Parents"- 5 out of 6
Psych- "Shawn, Interrupted"- 4 out of 6
Community- "Documentary Filmmaking: Redux"- 6 out of 6
The Big Bang Theory- "The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition"- 5 out of 6
Bones- "The Prince in the Plastic"- 5 out of 6
The Mentalist- "Pink Tops"- 3 out of 6
Chuck- "Chuck Vs the Business Trip"- 6 out of 6
Grimm- "Lonelyhearts"- 4 out of 6
Supernatural- "How to Win Friends and Influence Monsters"- 4 out of 6

Weekly Overview:
This week wasn't as strong as others, but it was still good. Tied for best this week are How I Met Your Mother, Community and Chuck. They all had good episodes, but The Best of the Week award goes to Chuck. The Worst of the Week unfortunately, has to be The Mentalist which for some reason had a very boring episode. Nothing really on next week, but I'll write what I can.

Best Moments:
- The shockingly sad ending to HIMYM this week.

- Crazy Shawn on Psych.

- Crazy Dean on Community.

- Supernatural and the ending heard 'round the internet.

Worst Moments:
- They're STILL on the farm?

TV News:
- Arrested Development will return in 2013 exculsively on Netflix Instant.

- NBC has decided to take Community off the fall schedule. Instead, the much more important and wildly creative Fear Factor will take its place.

- Ricky Gervais to return as Golden Globes host. Also, the Golden Globesnow has a reason to be watched.

See you later

Thursday, November 17, 2011

The Battle of the Snow Whites

Weather because of Twilight or last year's Alice in Wonderland 2012 is going to be seeing the release of not one, but TWO new movies based off of the character Snow White. And as both released their trailers this past week, I figured now was as good a time as ever to say my thoughts on the subject.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

So, "The Hunger Games" I Guess...

I may be one of the last people to say they haven't yet read The Hunger Games books, so I really can't comment on how faithful the movie will be to the books. However, I can say what I thought of the movie trailer that was recently released. So, ya, it looks like a movie...


Sunday, November 13, 2011

2010- 2011 TV Season Review: Week 8

Scores:
Once Upon a Time- "Snow Falls"- 5 out of 6
The Walking Dead- "Cherokee Rose"- 4 out of 6
Hell on Wheels- "Pilot"- 3 out of 6
How I Met Your Mother- "Disaster Averted"- 6 out of 6
Terra Nova- "Nightfall"- 5 out of 6
Castle- "Heartbreak Hotel"- 4 out of 6
Glee- "The First Time"- 5 out of 6
New Girl- "Cece Crashes"- 6 out of 6
Raising Hope- "Jimmy and the Kid"- 4 out of 6
Psych- "Dead Man's Curveball"- 5 out of 6
Community- "Studies in Modern Movement"- 6 out of 6
The Big Bang Theory- "The Ornithophobia Diffusion"- 5 out of 6
Chuck- "Chuck vs the Frosted Tips"- 6 out of 6
A Gifted Man- "In Case of Exposure"- 5 out of 6
Supernatural- "Season 7, Time For a Wedding!"- 5 out of 6
Grimm- "Beeware"- 5 out of 6

Weekly Overview:
    An overall solid week so far. This week we had four show tie for the title of Best of the Week. How I Met Your Mother, New Girl, Community and Chuck all had really great episodes this week. In the end though, New Girl was truly the funniest and best and gets the crown of Best of the Week.
    Worst of the Week is an easy pick. Unfortunately Hell on Wheels series premiere failed to impress as it was really too bland and slow to make much of an impression. I'll stick with it for a while, but it's not looking good.

Best Moments:
- Glee and Chuck both had their best episode of the season so far. Nice return to form.

- Elvis Castle.

- Schmitt does parkour! And hates cats!

- Psych made baseball interesting. Amazing!

- Karaoke on Community. Nuff' said.

Worst Moments:
- Man, The Walking Dead needs to pick up the pace.

- How I Met Your Mother let Barney out of the Ducky Tie. It was fun while it lasted.

- Supernatural, why is Becky still alive?

TV News:
- Billy Crystal is going to host the Oscars now. Also air is good and the sky is blue.

- Howard Stern might join as a judge on America's Got Talent. Ok, why not?

See you later.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Eddie Murphy No Longer to Host Oscars

After Brett Ratner stepped down as the 84th Academy Awards producer due to using and anti-gay slur in an interview over the weekend, Eddie Murphy, who was set to host the event, has stepped down as the show's host. Though Murphy did not say why, it is safe to say that it is most likely due to Ratner, who brought Eddie onto the show and directed him in the new film Tower Heist, stepping down as well.



It is not yet known who will replace Murphy and Ratner, but this is a serious, albeit understandable, set-back for the Academy. So, tell me, who should replace Murphy and Ratner? And how do you feel about this whole mess?

See you later.

Monday, November 7, 2011

2011- 2012 TV Season Review: Week 7

Scores:
The Walking Dead-"Save The Last One"- 5 out of 6
Once Upon a Time- "The Thing You Love the Most"- 4 out of 6
How I Met Your Mother- "The Slutty Pumpkin Returns"- 5 out of 6
Terra Nova- "Bylaw"- 5 out of 6
Castle- "Cops and Robbers"- 5 out of 6
Glee- "Pot O' Gold"- 4 out of 6
New Girl- "Naked"- 5 out of 6
Raising Hope- "Killer Hope"- 4 out of 5
Psych- "The Amazing Psych-Man and Tap Man, Issue #2"- 5 out of 6
Community- "Advanced Gay"- 6 out of 6
The Big Bang Theory- "The Isolation Permutation"- 5 out of 6
Bones- "The Memories in the Shallow Grave"- 6 out of 6- (Great new twist to an already good show)
The Mentalist- "Blinking Red Lights"- 6 out of 6
Chuck- "Chuck vs The Bearded Bandit"- 4 out of 6
A Gifted Man- "In Case of Memory Loss"- 4 out of 6
Grimm- "Bears Will Be Bears"- 4 out of 6
Supernatural- "The Mentalists"- 5 out of 6

Weekly Overview:
    Overall another very solid week this week. The top three episodes of the week are Community's funny and somewhat touching look at Pierce and his father, Bones's fantastic return and The Mentalist's great serial killer game. In the end though, The Mentalist wins the award for Best of the Week.
    The top three weakest is though the choose. No episode were really bad this week. But the weakest are: Glee's decent return, Raising Hope's decent return and Once Upon a Time's decent second episode. In the end, while not bad, Glee's return was the weakest episode this week.

Best Moments:
- The Walking Dead gives us another shocking ending this week.

- Hey look, The Mentalist also had a really shocking ending.

- Pregnant Bones is awesome.

Worst Moments:
- Glee and the stupid leprechaun story.

- Evil Morgan is awesome and horrible at the same time.

TV News:
- Oh ya. Breaking In is coming back after all. Cool.

- 60 Minutes's Andy Rooney passed away the week. He was 92.

- Once Upon a Time gets a full season order. Nine more episodes of awesome you say? Sounds good.

See you later.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Halloween 2011: "The Wolf Man"

    As we wrap up on Halloween 2011, I chosen to do my final Halloween review on one of not just my favorite Halloween films, but one of my favorite films of all time: The Wolf Man. No, not the 2010 version. The classic 1941 film that is still the best portrayal of werewolves yet. So, what makes this groundbreaker so great? Let's find out. Warning. There's some bad spoilers on the rise. This is a spoiler warning.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

2011-2012 TV Season Review: Week 6

Scores:
The Walking Dead- "Bloodletting"- 6 out of 6
Once Upon a Time- "Pilot"- 5 out of 6 (Fun with a great cast)
How I Met Your Mother- "Noretta"- 5 out of 6
Castle- "Demons"- 5 out of 6
Psych- "This Episode Sucks"- 5 out of 6
The Big Bang Theory- "The Good Guy Fluctuation"- 5 out of 6
Community- "Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps"- 4 out of 6
The Mentalist- "Where In The World is Carmine O'Brian?"- 5 out of 6
Chuck- "Chuck Vs. The Zoom"- 5 out of 6 (New changes work well)
Grimm- "Pilot"- 5 out of 6- (Cool concept, executed well)
Supernatural- "Slash Fiction"- 6 out of 6

Week Overview:
Supernatural and The Walking Dead both tie for best episode of the week. Supernatural was the best of the season so far, while The Walking Dead had it's best episode since the Pilot. All good episode this week, but Community's decent Halloween offer is weakest.

Best Moments:
- Lori takes charge on The Walking Dead.

- Psych's vampire costumes.

- Intersect Morgan is pretty cool.

Worst Moments:
- Walking Dead's kid surgery scene was kinda hard to watch.

TV News:
- Baseball makes TV schedule go crazy. Wait, people watch Baseball that much?

- Kaley Cuoco will host the next People's Choice Awards. Wait, people still vote for that?

- Charlie Sheen will return to TV with FX's Anger Management. Wait, people still watch Charlie Sheen?

Starting This Week:
- The Next Iron Chef: Super Chefs- (Food Network, Sundays)
- Glee- (Fox, Tuesday)
- New Girl- (Fox, Tuesday)
- Raising Hope- (Fox, Tuesday)
- Top Chef: Texas- (Bravo, Wednesdays)
- Bones- (Fox, Thursday)

See you later

Halloween 2011: "Frankenstein" Review

    The classics. The favorite movie monsters of film. Dracula. The Wolfman. The Creature From the Black Lagoon. All of these characters have stood the test of time to become cinema classic. But, what about Frankenstein's Monster? Does the 1931 film Frankenstein stand the test of time? Let's find out. Warning. Spoilers After This Point.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Halloween 2011: "Jason X" Review

    Slashers. One of the quintessential movie genres to be watched during Halloween. In the past we've had nightmares, serial killing Shatners and lots and lots of Saw. But of all the slashers, perhaps none are more iconic then Friday the 13th's own Jason Voorhees. The classic Camp Crystal Lake killer has made a ton of movies. So, what do you do with an iconic summer camp killer for his new movie? Why, shoot him into space of course! This is Jason X.

Halloween 2011: Chapmaniac Crossover "Fred 2"

As part of Halloween 2011, here's my friends, The Chapmaniac's review of the Fred 2 trailer.


Fred 2: Night of the Living Fred Trailer Review
    Don't you all remember a failed little movie named Fred? Of course
not! If you're like me, you're just going on and pretending this
little failure doesn't exist. Well, guess what? Something magical
happened last year. Fred made enough money to make a sequel. And based
off of the trailers I've seen, it's WORSE than the original. Oh god.
Grab your pepper spray, guys. The trailers themselves actually, in my
opinion, make Fred more annoying than he already is if that's
possible, and rip off unfunny Vampires Suck jokes. Yep, that's right
folks, Fred 2 has ripped off the lowest form of life. Why? Why?
Why?!!!!
    Well, I'll tell you. Mad (the horrendous TV show) made a spoof if
Twilight with Fred, because as we all know Terrible Movie + Terrible
Movie = Funny Spoof, right? Well, it should've, but with no adult
humor, it's just offensive and unfunny, sort of like the Irate Gamer.
Come on guys, you know it's true!
    So basically it seems Fred liked it, god knows why, and decided to
build a terrible Halloween-themed movie about it. Well, at least he
picked the right holiday for it, for this movie is likely to be so bad
it's scary. How bad? Well Fred 1 was at Human Centipede level for
reviews, so I predict Fred 2 will be even below that. Guys, stop
giving 1 Star movies sequels.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Halloween 2011: "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" Review

    Welcome to Day 2 of Halloween 2011! So after yesterday's Dreamworks review, I thought to myself, "Gee, those were fun, but they just weren't scary." So today, I'm going to review something scary that is synonymous with Halloween: a musical!
    The Rocky Horror Picture Show is one of, if not the, most popular "midnight movies" (movie played at midnight) and is one of the long-played movies of all time. It's still in theater to this very day. But is it good? Let's find out.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Halloween 2011: "Dreamworks Spooky Stories" Review

   With Halloween just five day away, I decided to do something special for the holiday. And what's more special then five straight days of Halloween reviews. Starting today and ending on Monday, Halloween night, I will release 5 Halloween related reviews. So, let's kick of Halloween 2011 with Dreamworks Spooky Stories.
    A special Halloween DVD release, Dreamworks Spooky Stories is a collection of three Halloween related TV and Direct-to-DVD specials based of of Dreamworks Animations characters.
    The first story is Scared Shrekless, an anthology of three parodies of famous horror movie done with Shrek characters. The connecting story is that Shrek, Donkey, Puss In Boots and Gingy all go to Lord Farquaads supposedly haunted castle to see who can last the longest without getting sacred. This part of the special does have it's funny moments, however the jokes are mostly predictable (save for a funny remake of the "Welcome to Duloc" song from the first movie).
    Gingy's story is a spoof of not only The Bride of Frankenstein, but also zombie movies. The Bride of Gingy follow Gingy as he has the Muffin Man make him a wife who starts to smother him. The story is the weakest of the three, as it has very little to do with The Bride of Frankenstein. It also is pretty predictable and only kinda funny. It's really just a time waster.
    Puss and Donkey's story, Boots Motel, follows, you guessed it, Puss and Donkey checking into a motel with a psycho in it. Again, this story has very little to do with the movie it's spoofing. However, it is very funny, with Puss and Donkey fight constantly ramping up as the story goes. The climax that involves a giant waffle and spray bottles of water is hysterical.
    The third and final story, The Shreksorist, follows Shrek as he babysits a "possessed child". The best of the three, the story is a good parody of the The Exorcist and is very funny in it own right. Overall, Scared Shrekless is not a Halloween classic, as the story don't all hit their mark, but it is a mostly enjoyable bit of Halloween worth checking out. It's 4 out of 6.
    The second story really has no purpose being here. The Ghost of Lord Farquaad (or Shrek 4-D repackaged) follows Fiona getting kidnapped by Lord Farquaad's ghost and Shrek and Donkey racing to save her. This was obviously a cash-in when it was Shrek 4-D and it's still a cash-in today. The short film is way too lame to be really enjoyable. The jokes were all done better if the other movies, the story is rushed and stupid and the characters are all poorly written.  For example, immediately after Fiona is kidnapped Shrek yells at Donkey for making a joke and not rushing to save her. But, just a few minutes later, while Fiona is still kidnapped mind you, Shrek goes out of his way to play a trick on Donkey just for fun. Can't you just tell we're dealing with people who worked hard on this story? Overall, The Ghost of Lord Farquaad is a lame, unnecessary bore. It's 2 out of 6.
    The third and final Halloween tale included is Monsters vs Aliens: Mutant Pumpkins From Outer Space. If you (like me) loved the original movie then this is going to be a very welcome edition to any regular Halloween viewing. The story follow the monsters as they face off against mutant pumpkins that are eating a town's Halloween candy. It might sound goofy, but trust me, it is. And it is great. Once again the characters are very funny and the short captures the spirit of Halloween and B-Movies very well. Though Susan does get shoved to the side most of the time. Overall, Monsters vs Aliens: Mutant Pumpkins From Outer Space is a very fun short film that will get you into instantly Halloween spirit. It is 6 out of 6.
    In the end, how much you want to buy Dreamworks Spooky Stories (or watch it on Netflix Instant) depends on how much you liked the previous movies. Of the two Shrek tales, Scared Shrekless is a mildly amusing offering, while The Ghost of Lord Farquaad is really lame. Monsters vs Aliens: Mutant Pumpkins From Outer Space, however is a lot of fun and perfect for Halloween. Overall, Dreamworks Spooky Stories is 4.5 out of 6. Now if you'd excuse me, I have to do the Time Warp again.

Monday, October 24, 2011

2011-2012 TV Season Review: Week 5

Scores:
The Walking Dead- "What Lies Ahead"- 5 out of 6- (Great show, great episode, though a bit too long)
How I Met You Mother- "Mystery Vs. History"- 4 out of 6
Terra Nova- "The Runaway"- 5 out of 6
Castle- "Eye of the Beholder"- 5 out of 6
Man Up- "Pilot"- 2 out of 6 (Not very funny)
Psych- "Last Night Gus"- 6 out of 6
The Big Bang Theory- "The Rhinitis Revelation"- 4 out of 6
Supernatural- "Shut Up, Dr. Phil"- 4 out of 6

Best Moments:
- The absolutely shocking ending to the premiere of The Walking Dead.

-Literally, EVERYTHING about this week's Psych. One of the shows best.

- Sam and Dean playing couples councillor to a pair of witches.

Worst Moments:
- Kal Penn is not a good edition to HIMYM.

- Man Up. Just Man Up.

Week Overview:
Overall, while not a really remarkable week over all Psych wins the award this week for best episode. (The Walkind Dead a firm second.) The worst of the week was wasily the lame and unfunny Man Up.

TV News:
- Charlie Sheen doesn't like the new Two and a Half Men. I don't know why. It's exactly the same without him. Lame and the same every week.

- The Punisher could be getting his own show on Fox. Sound cool, but remember what happened to the entertaining Human Target?

- Top Chef: Just Desserts had a contestant who was arrested for child pornography. Bravo's background checks are just the tops.

- They are bringing Fear Factor back to TV. Hurray?

Starting This Week:
- Once Upon a Time- (ABC, Sunday, 8)
- Chuck- (NBC, Friday, 8)
-Grimm- (NBC, Friday, 9)

See you later

Monday, October 17, 2011

In Dullest Day, In Dumbest Night: "Green Lantern" Review

                        SPOILER WARNING. THAT IS ALL.
    A while back while talking about X-Men: First Class, I said that movie franchises can be a tricky thing to do. Sometimes, if they go on too long, they can become stale and boring. Sometimes, thanks to poor box office numbers, good franchises don't get a chance to start. Then there are the franchises that don't get a chance to make it past the first movie because they suck from right out of the gate.
    Green Lantern showcases what happens if no one making the movie really bothers to try. Sure, the actors are working with what their given, but what their given isn't much more than a copy of several better superhero movies like Spider-Man and Batman and then being told to do something like that.
    Ryan Reynolds start as Hal Jordan AKA the newest member of the intergalactic piece keeping organization called The Green Lantern Corp. Given a ring that allows him to create anything he thinks up in his mind, Hal becomes a superhero. Naturally. Blake Lively stars as his love interest, Peter Saarsgard is the villain and Mark Strong play a fellow Green Lantern member.
    What kills Green Lantern almost right out of the starting gate is the lazy screenplay. The writers clearly don't have a single creative bone their FOUR bodies. (Yes, four people wrote this crap) The film starts with a big loud voice pretty much reading the text off of a text scroll that isn't really there. From that point on the movie sets it's tone of laziness and boredom. The film can even get it's own characters right. Lively's Carol Ferris at first seems to hate Hal's everything, but soon she has a heel-face turn and is 100% in love with him. Several character disappear after get thrown into windows (she had to have survived) and other just appear out of no where.
    The film's story doesn't fare much better. Hal leaves to go train with other Lanterns and when he comes back to Earth... nothing really happens. Seriously. He saves a party. Talks with Carol. Stops a bad guy. Talks with Carol. Fights the same bad guy again. Talks with Carol. Fights a different bad guy. Talks with Carol. The end. See a pattern? The film focuses way to much on the bland character development and doesn't bother to tells us about the superhero story it has.
    Plus, the special effects are some of the worst in a long time. In fact, Hal's mask might just better the worst special effect of the decade. The time the movie can really shine is when Hal uses the unlimited ring of power and yet it still sucks. All Hal (and the writers) can think to do are make Hot Wheels tracks and big fists. I mean, the big bad guy everyone says is the worst possible thing in the universe is defeated... after Hal punches him with a really big fist. How's that for creativity?
    Green Lantern may not be the worst film of this year (Transformers 3 can keep the crown). But it's certantly the laziest. The story is underdeveloped, the characters are bland, the action isn't creative and the special effects just suck. The only thing in the movie thats passible is the acting. Overall, Green Lantern sucks.
              GREEN LANTERN GETS A 2 OUT OF 6.

See you later.

PS. I know it was in the comics, but Sinestro's yellow ring scene during the credits makes no sense what so ever.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

2011-2012 TV Season: Week 4

Scores:
How I Met Your Mother- "Field Trip"- 4 out of 6
Terra Nova- "What Remains"- 5 out of 6
Castle- "Kick The Ballistics" 6 out of 6
Last Man Standing- "Pilot"- 3 out of 6- (Tim Allen gives it his all, but the show just isn't funny enough.)
Psych- "Shaun Rescues Darth Vader"- 5 out of 6- (One of the best shows on TV gets off to a good start.)
The Big Bang Theory- "The Russian Rocket Reaction"- 3 out of 6
Community- "Remedial Chaos Theory"- 6 out of 6
The Mentalist- "Ring Around the Rosie"- 6 out of 6
A Gifted Man- "In Case of Separation Anxiety"- 5 out of 6
Supernatural- "Defending Your Life"- 4 out of 6

Best Moments:
- Seamus Dever preformance this week on Castle is seriously Emmy-worthy.

-Psych's return featured two great moments: Shaun and the lie detector and the kid who loves the Star Wars prequels.

- Community. That is all.

Worst Moments:
- Am I the only one getting sick of Howard and Bernedette of The Big Bang Theory?

- Supernatural missed out on some possibly great moments by have Dean not tell sam about Amy.

News Stories:
- Fox has pushed Glee, New Girl and Raising Hope off the air until November for Baseball. Not really a big deal, but I don't like sports so not what am I suppose to watch on Tuesdays?

- ABC has cancelled the new (and awful) Charlie's Angles. Sorry angles, you won't be missed.

What to Watch:
- The Walking Dead on Sunday at 9 on AMC

See you later

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Short Stuff Worth Talking About

- The Avengers Trailer. I don't remember my reaction because I had passed out after the first couple seconds. After watching 12 more times I can safely say, it is good.

- The next Die Hard movie is going to be called A Good Day to Die Hard and come out Valentine's Day 2013. So far, I like that title a lot. It sounds cool. Or it sounds like the newest James Bond movie. Speaking of James Bond...

- Javier Bardem was annoucned this week as the villain for Bond 23 which is pretty cool. Also, the possible titles for the new movie include the awful Carte Blanche and the really cool Skyfall. I wonder which one they'll go with...

- The sequel to the awesome Taken, titled Taken 2 (What did you think it was going to be titled?), will be released on October 5, 2012. It will follow the Liam Neeson's family gets taken hostage... again.

- The sequel to the Percy Jackson movie, which I actually liked, is going to be released on March 27, 2013. It's titled Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

"Drive" Stupid

    Ok, so I don't like to call people I don't know names, but sometimes what they do is just too stupid to ignore. That a woman in Michigan for instance who is suing the distributors of the movie Drive because the movie was too smart for her. I'm not kidding. She's suing because the trailers looked like The Fast and The Furious and the actual movie was nothing like that.
    Now, this would all just be fun and games, if it wasn't for the fact that some idiot lawyers actually took the case. If this case somehow miraculously wins, that could spell a whole lot of trouble for good movies out there. If the case wins, then movie producers might start thinking, "Gee, if people are getting sued for NOT making a movie where two cars pull a bank vault behind it, then maybe I should only make those movies."
    Now, don't get me wrong. Liking The Fast and the Furious does not make you stupid. Suing people because the movie you where watching was nothing like The Fast and the Furious is. How she managed to see the trailer and not a single plot synopsis, review, interview or news story about the movie is something I find extremely fishy. Next time she should make sure to research the movie she is seeing. I wouldn't want her to walk into J. Edgar later this year think that, because Leonardo DiCaprio's in it, it must be Inception.

See you later.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

2011-2012 TV Season: Week 3

Now, I know my blog has sorta been skimping out on the whole Cinema part of Cinema Won. This stems from two problems I have been facing. The first is that my workload for school has been slowly getting bigger over the last few weeks. Second is the fact that I put myself in the difficult position of having to do multiple posts about TV instead of movies. Now, I've hopefully fixed problem number two by, instead of three separate posts a week, I'll be putting everything TV related I have to talk about in one big end of the week post. This is one of those posts.

Scores: (Here I will say what out of six I will give the past weeks episode)
Pan Am- "We'll Always Have Paris"- 4 out of 6
Castle- "Head Case"- 4 out of 6
Warehouse 13- "Emily Lake/Stand"- 6 out of 6
Glee- "Asian F"- 4 out of 6
New Girl- "Wedding"- 6 out of 6
Raising Hope- "Kidnapped"- 4 out of 6
Raising Hope- "Henderson Nevada-Adjacent Baby! Henderson Nevada-Adjacent"- 6 out of 6
Community- "Competitive Ecology"- 5 out of 6
The Big Bang Theory- "The Wiggly Finger Catalyst"- 5 out of 6
Person of Interest- "Mission Creep"- 4 out of 6
The Mentalist- "Pretty Red Balloon"- 5 out of 6
Supernatural- "The Girl Next Door"- 5 out of 6

Best Moments: (Here I will list my favorite moments of the week. Also SPOILER ALERT!)

- I know they'll undo it quickly next season, but Warehouse 13 killing Mrs. Fredrick and destroying the warehouse is still a great ending.

- Mike Chang singing "Cool" was easily one of Glee's best musical numbers.

- The chicken-dance and the photobooth on New Girl.

- Burt and Jimmy trying to raise cash while in Las Vegas was hysterical.

- Dean's shocking killing at the end of this weeks new episode.

Worst Moments: (Spoiler Alert)

- Mr. Shue going R. Lee Ermey on Mercedes this week was way too out of character.

- Hey, wasn't there a baby on Raising Hope?

- Supernatural last week set up an episode about Sam and Dean in a hospital filled with monsters, and then just set it aside three minutes into this week's episode. That was weak.

Television News: (here I will talk about a few new stories from the past week)

- The first casualties of the season were announced this week as The Playboy Club, Free Agents and H8R were all cancelled due to low ratings. None of these shows are a loss though.

- How to Be a Gentleman got the kiss of death as it was moved to Saturdays. I can say I sorry to see this one go either.

- Arrested Development fans rejoice as it was reveled this week that plan were in the works to revive to series for a short ten-episode run, followed by a feature-film. However, this has not yet been confirmed.

- After several long disputes over the cast's pay this week, The Simpsons was able to stop a "near-cancellation" (like that would have happened). The series has been renewed for two more seasons.

What to Watch: (Here I will say my most-anticipated show for the next week)
- Psych returns Wendesday
- The Walking Dead returns Sunday

See you later

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

2011 TV Season: Monday 3

How I Met Your Mother- (8, CBS)- "The Stinson Missile Crisis": After the past couple of good episodes, it's only natural for a show to fall a little bit. This week Robin told a psychiatrist about why she assaulted a woman and Ted became too hands-on with Lily's pregnancy. This week felt like the stories were just two kinda-funny joke stretched out until it started to break. Some funny moments, but not many.

Favorite Part: Ted's flashbacks of him as a third wheel
Least-Favorite Part: Ted got really weird this episode
The Verdict: 3 out of 6

Terra Nova- (8, Fox)- "Instinct": This weeks episode follwed the colony as they tried to stop a group of dino-birds from going all The Birds on Terra Nova. This week's episode improved greatly on the premiere and while not perfect, the show is seemingly become what we all hoped it would be: fun and exciting.

Favorite Part: The fact that the show is Eureka in the prehistoric age. Think about it. Town filled with scientist suffers from a scientific screw-up and a street-smart, but not really book-smart guy saves the day. Sound familiar?
Least-Favorite Part: So, the son's all nice now?
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

See you later

P.S. So, The Playboy Club got cancelled. Gues the ratings couldn't get it up. Thank you, I'm be here all week.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

"Battlefield 3" Beta Thoughts

Today I downloaded the beta for the upcoming game Battlefield 3 and you know what. It's good. Really good.

It's manages to get the special blend of the right gameplay, weapons, maps, graphics and everything you need to be awesome just right, so that the whole experience leaves you wanting more. So, Battlefield 3, consider yourself bought.

See you later.

P.S. Still want Arkham City more though.

2011 TV Review: Thursday and Friday 2

The Big Bang Theory- (CBS, Thurs, 8)- "The Pulled Groin Extrapolation": This week had Leonard and Amy going to a wedding together while Howard and Bernadette stay with Howard's mother. Unfortunately, this week's episode couldn't live up to the last two, as both storyline fell equally flat. No jokes were really all that memorable and some felt like they've been done before.

Favorite Part: Sheldon really does care about Amy (I think)
Least-Favorite Part: Howard's mom's a little too unbelievable
The Verdict: 3 out of 6

Community- (NBC, Thurs, 8)- "Geography of Global Conflict": Thisew episode found Britta protesting because a friend of herself is being held hostage, while the rest of the group helps Annie start a Model UN. The Annie UN story was at times truely hilarious, however, the Britta protest story ultimately fell flat.

Favorite Part: Abed and "Earth 2"
Least-Favorite Part: Britta's protesting
The Verdict: 4 out of 6

Supernatural- (CW, Fri, 9, Returning)- "Meet the New Boss" and "Hello, Cruel World": After some computer problems last week, I am now able to review the Supernatural season premiere as well as the newest episode. Both episode were great and get the season off to a good start. The episode follow Sam, Dean and Bobby as the fight both God Castiel and the new Laviathans. Both equally creepy and exciting, if I had to pick which was better, I would go with "Hello, Cruel World". It was just more intense.

Favorite Parts: MTNB: "Do you have any Grey Poupon?"/ HCW: The Devil's back!
Least-Favorite Parts: MTNB: Cass's is fine at the end. Oh, wait no he' not/ HCW: Stupid cliffhangers!
The Verdicts: MTNB: 5 out of 6/ HCW: 6 out of 6

See you later

P.S. I didn't get a chance to review it, but seriously, A Gifted Man is the best new show. Period.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Rebooting the Kombat

    Maybe you have heard of a small video game series called Mortal Kombat. It has tried several time to make it's way to the big screen. First in 1995 with the surprisingly titled Mortal Kombat which was met with weak review. But that did stop the sequel, Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, from sucking even worse. After that the was even a failed TV series. For a while it seemed like the chances of a new Kombat movie were slim. For a while, at least...





    Then last year the series started up again with Mortal Kombat: Legacy. The webseries was a somewhat test to see if a new Kombat movie would work. Now, it seems New Line Cinema is ready to fight once again.
    Set to be directed by Kevin Tancharoen (Whose other film credits include the Fame remake and Glee: The 3D Concert Movie. Odd choice.) the new film will be released most likely either late 2012 or sometime in 2013.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

2011 TV Review: Tuesday 2

Now as you may have already noticed, Cinema Won has quickly evolved into Television Won and, while that would make a pretty good spinoff website, I will eventually get around to my movie news and reviews again. It's just that these TV post take me literally 5 minutes to write and I've been swamped with school work recently.

Glee- (8, Fox)- "I Am Unicorn": After last week's poor return, it's nice to see that Glee is seemingly back on track. The episode was fun and had some character moments that were honestly nice. However, the whole Brittney/Kurt president was VERY underdone.

Favorite Part: Shue's telling off of Quinn
Least-Favorite Part: Bland songs this week
The Verdict: 4 out of 6

New Girl- (9, Fox)- "Kryptonite": This week's episode follow Jess and her attempts to get her stuff back from her ex-boyfriend. The second episode continues the strong, though not spectacular, humor of the Pilot, while advancing the story just a little. Good, but still miss something to make it great.

Favorite Part: Schmitt. Don't really need to say anything else.
Least-Favorite Part: Jess is a little too annoying
The Verdict: 4 out of 6

Raising Hope- (9:30, Fox)- "Sabrina Has Money": This week the Chance family did the classic sitcom trope: One character is actually rich. This time around it was Sabrina who said she had cut herself off. The episode could have easily become cilche, but thankfully, it took a new spin on the concept. Plus, fancy toilets are just really funny.

Favorite Part: Burt trying to realize Sabrina has money
Least-Favorite Part: The ending was just a little too cheesy
The Verdict: 6 out of 6

See you later

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

2011 TV Review: Monday 2

Terra Nova- (8, Fox, New)- "Genesis: Parts 1 and 2" Terra Nova is easily the most anticipated show of the fall. It's easy to see why: man-eating dinosaurs on a weekly basis. Awesome. However, as time lead up to the premiere many wonder if the show would really be as good as we'd hoped. Well, it kinda is. In case you don't know, the show is about a family who joins in a expedition into the past in order to make sure the Earth doesn't get destroyed again. The cast is pretty good in their roles and the show is extremely entertaining. However the story just isn't very interesting. Yet. See, I think because the first episode is two-hours long, the story is stretched out more than it should have been. But, once the show gets to it's hour-long format, I think it will work a lot better.

Favorite Part: That dinosaur like totally ate that dude.
Least-Favorite Part: Will a dinosaur eat the son and his friends already?
The Verdict: 4 out of 6

How I Met Your Mother- (8, CBS)- "Ducky Tie": The third episode of season 7 follow the gang as Lily and Marshall bet Barney that he could perform a series of difficult tasks. If he won he could touch Lily's boobs. If he lost he had to wear Marshall's ducky tie for a year. Also, Ted tells Robin about how he ran into Victoria. A good, not great, episode had it's laughs, but felt like a cheat (Get it?) with Victoria.

Favorite Part: Ted and Robin going back and forth while Lilly, Marshall and Barney argued.
Least-Favorite Part: No dinosaurs
The Verdict: 4 out of 6

Castle- (10, ABC)- "Heroes and Villains": On last night episode, Castle and Beckett investigated the murder of a man with a splitting headache (Again, get it?). Along the way they learn their killer is a superhero by the name of "Lone Vengence". A very funny episode, with a weak case that seemed to keep ending and undoing itself.

Favorite Part: The superhero story
Least-Favorite Part: Castle's daughter is kinda really annoying\
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

See you later

Saturday, September 24, 2011

2011 TV Review: Thursday 1: Part 2

Charlie's Angels- (8, ABC, New)- "Angel With A Broken Wing": Remaking a movie is something that rarely gives us a good film largely due to the fact than the movies being remade are movies than were popular, but never good to begin with or remakes of great movies than can never be topped. TV, however, should be able to remake shows with ease because of the large number of shows whose premises can be redone well. But very, very few remakes have found success. Rember Knight Rider? Bionic Woman? Wonder Woman didn't every get out of the pilot stage. However, last year Hawaii 5-0 prove a TV remake can be done well, so now ABC is trying their hand with a new Charlie's Angels. Long story short, they failed. Miserably. The show suffers from a long list of problems, mainly weak acting and shockingly bad writing ("I didn't know my heart could hurt so much" is an actual line from the episode). The one good think the show has going for it is it's nice production values.

Favorite Part: The production value
Least-Favorite Part: The random character killing in order for the show to have a "dark origin"
The Verdict: 2 out of 6

Person of Interest- (9, CBS, New)- "Pilot": I never was a fan of Lost. I thought it was confusing just to be confusing. So it surprises me to see just how little Person of Interest (Made by the same studio as Lost) had to do with Lost. That however, may or may not be a good thing. Interest is interesting (Get it?). The cast is great and the premise is fantastic. So then, why does it feel so average? Because it's a CBS procedural of course. the show, no matter how well made, is just so similar feeling it's kinda hard to take to it. Still, the cast and premise are enough to add it to my schedule this season.

Favorite Part: Michael Emerson
Least-Favorite Part: Isn't Taraji P. Henson suppose to be in this show?
The Verdict: 4 out of 6

The Mentalist- (10, CBS, Returning)- "Scarlett Ribbons": I'll keep this nice and short seeing as how I already reviewed the show in my review of last season's finale. The episode greatly wrapped up last season cliffhanger with a strong case and a nice reveal at the end.

Favorite Part: The interesting case
Least-Favorite Part: Grace's "I-shot-my-fiance-but-I'm-fine" performance
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

See you later

2011 TV Review: Thursday 1: Part 1

Community- (8, NBC, Returning)- "Biology 101": Community is the by far on of the most underrated shows currently on television. The hysterical show features one of TV's most talented casts as they go to community college. The show is incredibly inventive. However, last night premiere focused mainly on the characters. The episode followed Jeff as he tried to rejoin the study group after getting kicked out of their Biology class. The episode, while not perfect, showed just how great the show is.

Favorite Part: The Dean Wars
Least-Favorite Part: Abed's very small (and lame) storyline
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

The Big Bang Theory- (8, CBS, Returning)- "The Skank Reflex Analysis": Where's Community is underrated, Big Bang is very highly rated, even being renewed for the next 2 TV season. Thankfully, unlike some shows *coughAmericanIdolcough*, Big Bang is popular because it is simply good. Often funny and with a great cast, the show entered it's 4th season on Thursday with two new episodes. The first and the better followed the aftermath of Penny and Raj's "hook-up" in last seasons finale. The show wrapped the storyline in a nice and believable way, and remained funny the whole time though. Though, like Monday's HIMYMs, the show never really reached the level of greatness it could have.

Favorite Part: Raj's expaination of what happened
Least-Favorite Part: Leonard's mother's lame cameo
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

"The Infestation Hypothesis": The second story followed Sheldon's attempts to get rid of a chair Penny found in the street. Though as funny as the first, the second episode was weaker due to it's lack of moving characters forward, save Leonard and Pria's online relationship.

Favorite Part: Sheldon is right for once
Least-Favorite Part: The episode ending before we see Sheldon reaction
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

Whitney- (9:30, NBC, New)- "Pilot": Whitney Cummings has two new show on TV this fall. the first, 2 Broke Girls, was an average comedy on CBS. The second, Whitney, stars Cummings as a woman in a long relationship. How riveting. Now, I went into Whitney (That's what she said!) with very low expectations after a series of painfully unfunny and annoying posters for the show appeared everywhere (The silent treatment isn't a reward it's not funny!). And, low and behold, the show sucks. Bland, unfunny and just plain boring, Whitney is a huge miss.

Favorite Part: Whitney's awful doctor role-playing
Least-Favorite Part: Literally everything else
The Verdict: 2 out of 6

See you later and stay online for Part 2 when I review the series premieres of Person of Interest and Charlie's Angels and the season premiere of The Mentalist.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

The Greatest Movie Ever: "Back to the Future" Review

Ok, this is heavy. Having to pick my favorite movie is a hard choice but, Back to the Future is just so incredible that it's almost not even fair to other movies. The entire trilogy has effected our culture in ways that no other film can say. Ever since the movie was released hoverboards have been highly anticipated, 88 miles an hour isn't just a speed anymore and Deloreans have been coveted by film fans everywhere. For me, Back to the Future has become more than just my favorite movie. It has changed the way I act and think. So, buckle up, because where we're going, we don't need roads.

The main star of this movie is, well, the main stars. Michael J. Fox stars as main character Marty McFly. What makes Fox perfect in the role is not how he act around the strange things that are happening to him. It's how he reacts to them. Fox's deadpan is hysterical. The way he can act completely dumbfounded at what's going on and yet, just goes along with it is an example of writing at it's best. But, of course, the true star of the films is Christopher Lloyd as Doctor Emmett Brown. The energy Lloyd brings to the character adds to the entire movie. His optimism in the face of trouble is great, but the fact that he isn't just another "mad scientist" character is what makes him so fantastic.

The story is also a major factor in what makes this series so great. With time-travel, plots can become confusing and riddled with holes. But Back to the Future avoids this by being both complex and simple at the same time. The first movie is, at it's simplest, about a guy try to help to friends fall in love. But what it's really about is a guy trying to stop his own mother from trying to date him and have her date his father before he disappears from existance, while trying to get to his home, which is 30 years into the future. Now, that's a lot of plot. But the film weaves it's story so well, that every aspect is given it's fair share of screentime. That what makes Back to the Future so great, and my favorite movie of all time. 6 out of 6.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

2011 TV Review: Tuesday 1

Glee- (8, Fox, Returning) "The Purple Piano Project": I for the last two years have been a minor "Gleek". The show's first season is great and is something I am proud to say I like. The second season however suffered majorly from the "Sophomore Slump", when a show's second season fails to live up to its first. However, I went into the third season premiere hoping for the best. And in the end I was left with something worse that it just being plain old bad. I was left with a meh. Glee is still fun and interesting to watch. However, the show feels the need to consantly revert back to square one, throwing almost all previous continuity out the window. This was no exception as every plot point and change for the better that occured last season is quickly thrown aside for more weak character drama and been-there-done-that storylines. Glee may still be fun, but it's losing it's charm fast.

Favorite Part: The musical numbers
Least-Favorite Part: The plot discontinuity
The Verdict: 3 out of 6

New Girl- (9, Fox, New) "Pilot": Now I watched the pilot several weeks ago when it was available early on demand, but I rewatched last night and it reinforced what I already knew. This year has so far failed to deliver any brand new show that have been anything really worth watching from week to week. Not the case anymore though. Zoe Deschanel stars in the infectously fun show, which features a funny cast and well written dialouge. One to watch this season.

Favorite Part: The douchebag jar (If me and my friends had one, we'd all break even. Mostly)
Least Favorite Part: Jess can get a little too annoying
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

Raising Hope- (Fox, 9:30, Returning) "Prodigy": Raising Hope quickly became my favorite new of last year. Smart, funny and with a great cast, the show arguably perfected what shows like Modern Family already had already done very well: create a sitcom about an abnormal family situation. In this case, a man is saddled with a baby after a one-night-stand with a serial killer. The second season doesn't show any signs that the show will be slowing down as it followed Jimmy learning he was a great singer and piano player. Hilarious from start to finish, Hope is a show everyone should be watching.

Favorite Part: The opening song
Least Favorite Part: Can't think of one
The Verdict: 6 out of 6

See you later

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

2011 Fall TV: Monday 1

In the next installment of this new daily(ish) series, I take a look at new episodes of shows on Monday nights, starting with...

How I Met Your Mother- (8, CBS, Returning) Last night the first TWO episodes of Season 7 premiered. The first, "The Best Man" followed Ted at his friends Punchy's wedding, Robin realizing she still love Barney, Barney trying to call Nora and Lily and Marshall try to decide when to tell their friends Lily's pregeant. The weaker of the 2 episode, it still was very funny, but never quite made full use of it's great storylines.

Favorite Part: Barney and Robin's dance. (Though I still can't get that song out of my head.)
Least-Favorite Part: Anything Punchy related. (He's too annoying.)
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

The second episode. "The Naked Truth" followed Marshall as he tried to remove an embarrassing video from the internet, Ted as he dated two women at once (It's nicer than it sounds) and Barney as he told Nora every lie he's told to woman. This episode, especially Beericles, was very funny and a good show over how good HIMYM can be. Plus, Martin Short looks to be a great guest.

Favorite Part: Beericles
Least-Favorite Part: Not knowing who the girl at the end was
The Verdict: 5 out of 6

Two and a Half Men- (9, CBS, Returning) I am not what you would call a "fan" of this show. However, I tuned in to see what would change with Charile Sheen out and Ashton Kutcher in, in the season 9, premiere "Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt" which introduced Kutcher's character and killed off Sheen's. Unfortunately, nothing really has changed. Charlie funeral boarded on distasteful and Ashton is just the same character as Sheen, just sadder. Still unfunny as ever.

Favorite Part: The cameo apperances
Least-Favorite Part: How painfully unfunny everything was after Kutcher came in
The Verdict: 2 out of 6

2 Broke Girls- (9:30, CBS, New) One of the most confusingly anticipated shows of the fall was this show. From the previews, for me at least, it looked like a generic "Hey-We're-Girls-Saying-Offensive-Things" show someone tries to do evry year. And, unfortunately, I was right. ThePilot episode introduced the characters and the show's bland and lazy humor. It's pretty much Two and a Half Men with women.

Favorite Part: Leads Kat Dennings and Beth Behrs (They deserve a better show)
Least-Favorite Part: "I hope that's clam chowder" (Didn't see that one coming. No sir.)
The Verdict: 3 out of 6

Castle- (10, ABC, Returning) Castle is definately one of the best show currently on TV. Last season finale set up this season great, and now the 4th season premiere, "Rise", is here! The plot follow Castle and Beckett as they try to find Beckett's shooter. The tension was great and the story was entertaining. However, the cases were both underdeveloped.

Favorite Part: The opening in the hospital
Least-Favorite Part: The cases not really being interesting
The Verdict: 6 out of 6

See you later.

Friday, September 16, 2011

2011 Fall TV Review: Part 1

Right now, all of the big 5 networks (CBS, NBC, ABC, Fox and The CW) are returning from their summer hiatuses with shows new and old. Over the next couple weeks, I will review the return and pilot episodes of these show and give my personal opinion about what you should watch this new year.

RINGER: (Tues. 9, CW, New) Sarah Michelle Geller returns to TV in the new CW series about a woman who steals here better-off twin sister identity after the sister dies. The biggest thing the show has going for it is Geller. Her return is very welcome and fortunately, she is steller in the lead role. Her preformence sucks you right in and makes you want to know what happens next. The same can't be said for the story however. The whole pilot seems rushed, as if the (sometimes overly) complex plot is too much for the show to handle. Geller's character, Bridget, never really is believeable enough. Her motavations for taking her sister life doesn't really make sense. However, Ringer has a way of just sucking you in and for that it gets a 4 out of 6.

H8R: (Wens. 8, CW, New) H8R has a very good premise. Find a celebrity's most vocal "hater" and force them to spend a day with said celebrity. Unfortunately, the too-hip-to-be-good show squanders it's awesome premise by screwing up one part of that premise: the celebrities. The pilot episode's "celebrities" are a former Bacholer and Snooki. Nathan Fillion they ain't. The show feels like it's trying so hard to impress the teenage audience that the whole thing come across as fake (like Snooki. BAH-DUM-PA!). The show is most likely scripted as the "ordinary" people are just a little too writers-room witty for their own good. Still, H8R might be able to work if it can get real celebrities, but, untill then, H8R, gets a 2 out of 6.

UP ALL NIGHT: (Wens. 10, NBC, New) Man, does this show have a talented cast. Chrisitna Applegate, Will Arnett and Maya Rudolph star in this NBC comedy about a couple who try to raise their first-born daughter, while dealing with the own personal lives as well. The cast make this show very funny and enjoyable from the get-go. The show's one big problem however is Raising Hope. You see, everything Up All Night does, has been done before and done better on Raising Hope. In the end, Up All Night may just be Raising Hope's leftovers, but there really isn't a moment where the show isn't at least enjoyable. 4 out of 6.

FREE AGENTS: (Wens. 10:30, NBC, New) Following Up All Night is this clunker. Staring The Simpsons funnyman Hank Azaria and Kathryn Hahn. The show is about two recently single people that work together after they have a one-night stand. The only real shining light of Agents is Azaria. He play pathetic and funny well. The rest of the show however can be summed up with the phrase "Well, it didn't suck too much." The show doesn't offer up anything new or particularly interesting. Instead, Free Agents lands firmly in Bland territory, and it ain't getting out any time soon. 3 out of 6.

I will have Part 2 up hopefully next Tuesday. Until then...
See you later.

P.S. TV, please don't bleep swear words out of scripted shows. It's not edgy, it really freaking annoying.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

You Should Get That Looked At: "Contagion" Review

    SPOILERS MAKE PEOPLE SICK. MILD SPOILER WARNING HERE. POSSIBLY.
      The reason Contagion was for me a highly-anticipated film was mostly not about it looking great, but more about the fact the September and October of this year are wastelands of nothing. Other than the occasional bright spot like the upcoming In Time or Killer Elite, the next two months are filled mostly with sequels that shouldn't have been made (Paranormal Activity 3), new films that don't look like anything to look at (Real Steel) or "blockbuster" movies deemed unfit to run in the summer (The Three Musketeers). So, when Contagion, the first honestly good-looking film of the fall was released, I could not wait to see it.
    Turns out I probably should have.
    Contagion is not a great film. Contagion is, however, not a bad film either. Contagion, like this summer's Cowboys and Aliens, walks the line of greatness, but never actually crosses it. The biggest problem is that the film focuses not on what would happen if a virus sweeps the world, wiping out a good chuck of the population and the panic it creates, but rather on the politics behind a virus that sweeps the world wiping out half of the population.
    Of the three major plots that take up this movie, only one follows the story of a regular man (Matt Damon). His story is one that, if given the time and focus that it deserved, could have made for an incredible film. His story follows Damon as he tries protects his protect his daughter from the virus. What make this story so interesting is that Damon's character is immune to the virus. The film rarely touches upon the great fortune and burden this would put on a normal everyday person, who is watching the people he knows and cares about die around him, but he himself can't get sick and can't do anything to help them.
    Instead, the movie shoves this point aside to tell the dull tale of Laurence Fishburne, a member of the CDC as he leads a team to try and figure out just what the virus is. This leads to problems however, because his team is so large that the film can't handle all of the many different storylines going on. This causes the editing to jump all over the place making characters disappear for a majority of the film and creating various plot holes.
    The final of the three storylines is Jude Law's. He play a blogger as he tries to prove that the virus is just, like, one big conspiracy, man. The weakest of the plots, it kind of makes sense, but it still is tough to follow. There is never really anyone to root for and I think the film attempts to add in a twist at the end, but it mainly fall flat on it's face because, for me at least, I didn't realize until I really thought about it that the film hadn't been setting it up from the very beginning.
    And while all of that sounds bad, Contagion makes things even more confusing because the film is just so well-made. All of the actors are bring their a-game, and while I don't think we'll be seeing any of them nominated, I for one, wouldn't at all be surprised if they did. Plus, the film is well written and does from time to time suck you into the story. But, where the film really stands out is the at times beautiful cinematography and direction by Steven Soderbergh. The film really does look nice and is enjoyable to watch.
    Contagion is a very odd specimen. Never has a bad (or more rather, bland) movie been so well made, at least that I've seen. The acting, writing and, above all else, directing is just top notch. However, the editing leaves the film with several plotholes and the story never feels as exciting has it should have or could have been. It's just a well-made missed oppertunity.
                     CONTAGION GETS A 3 OUT OF 6.
See you later.
   
   

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Cinema Won Reviews: Episode 2: Twilight

Here's the second video review me and Liam did. This time it takes us 3 parts to takle Twilight. Plus, a sneak peek at what's to come.

Part 1:
                                      
Part 2:

Part 3:

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Eddie Murphy to Host the 84th Annual Academy Awards



So as many of you probably know, Eddie Murphy has been announced as the host for the Oscars in 2012. This is most likely because of what was seen by many as Anne Hathaway and James Franco's failure at the Oscars last year. I personally liked the two host and Eddie host is more to reinvigorate his career than the Awards. Still, I think he's going to be a great host. So, do you think Murphy will be a good host? Did you like Hathaway and Franco? And who was your favorite Academy Awards host?

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

2011 Summer Movie Recap

I was just going to say by favorites and least-favorite films of the summer, but, I figured why not just talk about all of the movies that came out this summer that I saw, starting with...

THOR: A truely fantastic superhero movie with a great cast boosted by one of the best story adaptations ever. 5 out of 6.

KUNG FU PANDA 2: Talk about a surprise! This is the perfect example of how to make a sequel. It's bigger, riskier and, above all, better than the first. 6 out of 6.

X-MEN: FIRST CLASS: While easily the best of the X-Men movie, the film lacks something to truely maki it memorable. Still, a great movie in a weak series. See the full review at my blog. 5 out of 6.

SUPER 8: Man was this a great movie. The action was great, the characters wer great. Overall, this is a very underrated film. 6 out of 6.

CARS 2: Pixar may have focused too much on humor and too little on story, but this film was just a lot of fun. Full review at blog. 5 out of 6.

TRANSFORMERS: DRAK OF THE MOON:  The first Transformers was great, the second was good, but the third is the same as all of the other and is really uninteresting. Full review at blog. 2 out of 6.

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 2: While yes, the film is a fitting end to the series, it isn't very accessable to those who haven't read the books. Full review at blog. 4 out of 6.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER: Easily the best superhero film of the summer, the movie was just awesome from start to finish. Full video review on blog. 6 out of 6.

COWBOYS AND ALIENS: Firefly is an example of western/sci-fi merging gone insanely right. This film is an example of western/sci-fi merging gone horribly wrong. A major bore. 3 out of 6.

CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE: A sweet, very funny movie that balences a large cast nicely.Full review on blog. 5 out of 6.

RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES: Another big surprise, the film managed to be a great action movie and a great drama at the same time. 6 out of 6.

Overall, this has been one of the best summer for movies in a long time. And now, let me give out my top 3 best and worst list of the summer.

THE BEST:
1. Super 8
2. Kung Fu Panda 2
3. Rise of the Planet of the Apes

THE WORST:
1. Transformers: Dark of the Moon
2. Cowboys and Aliens
3. Green Lanturn (I didn't need to see it to know it sucked.)

Friday, August 26, 2011

Chapmaniac Crossover: High School Musical 2 DVD Review

    Yesterday, when The Chapmaniac went on vacation, I filled in for him and wrote a review for the High School Musical 2 DVD: http://videogamaniac.blogspot.com/2011/08/but-theres-no-high-school-in-this-high.html. Because, as you know, while the critics are away, the cinemas continue to play!

Mini-Reviews From the Archives

    Okay, so I know I haven't been very good about posting lately, but we've been redoing our house so our computer has been boxed away for a while. I've been making due on library computers, like this. Now, next week I will hopefully have my computer back and will hopefully start posting again. However, school is also starting soon and that might put a dent in what I can post when.
    And since I don't have much time to do anything today, I figured I would feature with you so reviews I posted on my Facebook page that haven't been on this blog yet, starting with...

All Girls Are Evil: Odd Girl Out Review:
    WOW! I mean WOW! This is bad. REALLY BAD. This film made me physicaly ill. Now, don't get me wrong. I truely appreciate the message this film is saying. But, from a filmmaking standpoint, it's just terrible. The main character tries to be a female role model, but instead comes off as a bloody idiot. After she attempts to kill herself over her former best friend bullying her, SHE DECIDES TO BECOME FRIENDS WITH HER AGAIN. The film is very poorly edited, dropping and introducing stories at the drop of a hat. Part way through the movie, the main character's mother finds mean messages from the bullies. The bullies are brought in to see the principle where she gives the bullies a decison: either fess up to the messages and get a weeks suspension (So a girl tries to kill herself because of them and all the get is susspended?) or get expelled. What happens? I don't know. The bullies are at graduation with no explanation of what optition the chose. The film is so heavy-handed and so mean-spirited it's unpleasant to sit through. Also many people told be that the almost pitch-black lighting of the school is to show the dark atmosphere, but honestly it just looks like the budget was so low the couldn't pay for lighting. Overall, Odd Girl Out is heavy-handed, mean-spirited, poorly edited and unpleasant. Even a good message can't save this flop. 1.5 Out of 6.

Runaway Train of Boredom: Unstoppable Review:
   I know I may be going against the grain on this one, but I for one found Unstoppable to be a cliched, boring film. Unstoppable never seems to get going. I was waiting for the action to ramp up but it never did. There is no tension in this film, because the cliched script is so predictable. The film has so many false endings that it gets to be annoying after the tenth time. The only thing that saves Unstoppable from being a total failure is the fine performances of the cast. Overall, Unstoppable just never starts.  3.5 out of 6.

This Is One Wierd Episode of Glee: I Am Number Four Review:
     I Am Number Four is an entertaining, yet flawed, movie. It stars Alex Pettyfer as Number Four, AKA John Smith as he tries to take down the evil Mogadorians. Overall the plot is nothing special, but competent enough to keep the film together and make you intested in the characters. However, like any other generic action movie, an modest moviegoer can guess what going to happen before it does. Pettyfer sometimes can't handle the lead role by not given the more emotional part enough emotion, but he is a competent lead. Dianna Agron play Sarah, Pettyfer's love interset. She holds her own, however she fail to make the character memorable. (Although that might be the writer's fault.) Teresa Palmer play fellow alien Number Six and does alot better with her role than Agron. Kevin Durand play the film's villain, Commander. He does fine, though sometimes he gets hilariously over the top. But, by far the best actor is Timothy Olyphant as John's mentor and protecter Henri. He's the most entertaining and intesting character thank in no small part to Olyphant performance. However the best part of I Am Number Four is definately the action. While at times it can be tough to see, it is extremely entertaining. The end is easily the best part thanks to this, though it not without it's share of problems. (Like a villain being defeated because he slips in a puddle.) The worst part is that the film , much like the new Harry Potter movie, sets up a sequel that sounds way more interseting than the film we just watched. So, overall, I Am Number Four is an entertaininh movie, but scattered performances, dull moments, weak plotting and stupid moments wiegh down water could have been a fantastic film. 4.5 out of 6.

Spitting Bullets and Drinking Cactus Juice: Rango Review:
    Rango follows a story that we've all heard at one point or another. Hero lies about who he is to become popular. Hero gets a big head. Hero is found out to be a fraud and leaves. Hero then returns to save the day after a moment of reflection. And yet, Rango is a highly enjoyable movie elevated by a great script and a great cast. Johnny Depp is very good as the immensely likeable Rango. Isla Fisher is good as Rango love interest, Bean. And everyone else is usually entertaining. The humor and story could have been dumbed down for kids but it's not. In fact, if anything, Rango is not a movie for kids. People die at the drop of a hat and the language may be too much for 7 or 8 year olds. Another good thing worth noting is a wonderful cameo moment that ranks up there with Zombieland's awesome cameo. Overall, Rango may not be for kids, but for everyone else, it's one fun and exciting ride, however on is left with a sour taste in their mouth after watching this film. 3 out of 6.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Who Let the Cat Out?: "Catwoman" Review

INTRODUCTION: Catwoman is an in-name-only-adaptation of the DC Comics character. Hallie Berry stars as the title "hero", with Sharon Stone as the "villian" and Benjamin Bratt as the love "interest".  The film also stars Lambert Wilson and Alex Borstein.

THE REVIEW: Catwoman is a remarkable film, not for what it does right, but for the fact that it does almost everything WRONG. Take Catwoman for example. The film makes it's first mistake by giving the powerless superheroine al of the super powers... of a CAT. If that weren't bad enough, the film keeps giving her powers that just don't make sense. Like freaking BASKETBALL POWERS. And if that wern't bad enough, she starts to behave like a cat too. Like, imagine, if in Spider-Man, Peter Parker not only had spider powers, but also spun webs and ate bugs. It be pretty freaking stupid.
    Plus, the whole film follows the story behind a supposedly toxic beauty cream. Yes, the magic item that starts the whole story isn't the Ark of the Covenant. It isn't an alien spaceship. No, it's a FREAKING BEAUTY CREAM. And the film  doesn't even know what the cream really does. For Stone's character, she says that if she uses it it turns her skin to marble, and if you stop your skin disintagrates. However, the best friend (Borstein) uses it all of the time and then stop using it... and nothing ever happens to her.
    The film also can get it's message right. The whole "female empowerment" theme is lazily forgotten during most of the movie. Not that if it was given more time it would be better. Catwoman was a timid woman who only begins to feel confident after she become a leather-clad, oversexed crime fighter. The only other female main characters are the cat lady, a woman whose willing to horribly disfigure other women for no good reason and a best friend that will have sex with anything that moves.

THE VERDICT: Catwoman fails on almost every concivible level. The message is lazy, the acting is phoned-in, the title character is a joke and the plot is an aboulute mess. The adaptation not only manages to ingnore everything the original charcter was while being a completely terrible movie in the process. Overall, it made me go 1.5 out of 6.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

What Happened to Ocean's 1-10?: "The Ocean's Trilogy" Review

INTRODUCTIONS: Ocean's 11, 12 and 13 are a series of films directed by Steven Soderbergh and follow the heists performed by a group of thevies that were released in 2001, 2003 and 2007. Ocean's 11 is made up of George Clooney (as Ocean), Brad Pitt, Matt Damon, Don Cheadle, Bernie Mac, Scott Cann, Casey Affleck, Elliott Gould, Carl Reiner, Eddie Jemison and Shaobo Qin. The series also stars Julia Roberts, Andy Garcia, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Vincent Cassel, Eddie Izzard, Ellen Barkin and Al Pacino.

THE REVIEWS: Ocean's Eleven is easily to best of the series. This comes mainly by the fact that here is where the large cast is used the best. Each characters has their own personality, story and moments to shine. The heist is also the best, with the whole thing coming together nicely at the end. However, the film is not very memorable. Nothing in the film really goes above and beyond. This however might work to the film's advantage, as it increases the replay factor of the movie.
    Ocean's Twelve is very good at doing the opposite of what made Ocean's Eleven good. Taking a large cast and making them each memorable? Na, let's only focus on Brad Pitt, Matt Damon and Julia Roberts. Pretty sad when the character your movie is named after is the fourth most inportant character. A pace that makes the movie feel just right? Nope, Ocean's Twelve overly breezy pacing makes the film feel shorter than it actually is. And that's not a good thing. Have a heist movie with ACTUAL FREAKING HEISTS? WRONG. GUESS AGAIN! The film has not one, not two, not even three, but TWO heists and somehow they forget to talk about them. Remember how Eleven's one heist took up almost the last hour of the film. Twelve's TWO heist take up about ten minutes of the 125-minute movie. The one thing that keeps this movie from absolute failure is an hilarious extended cameo by Bruce Willis.
    Ocean's Thirteen is a thankful return to form for the series. The cast is all giving their A-game yet again. The heist is different and entertaining. Al Pacino serves as a great new villian. And yet, the film can't help but feel unneccesary. No matter how fun the proccedings get, the film still feel like a rehashing of the first. Maybe it's returning to the Vegas setting. Maybe it's Andy Garcia's entirely unneeded role in the film. I don't know, but at least Thirteen is fun and memorable.

THE VERDICTS: In the end, Ocean's Eleven is the first and the best. The large cast is memorable and well used and the heist is extremely well-done. However, the film's lack of memorablility leave the movie 5 out of 6.
    Ocean's Twelve makes the most out of a Bruce Willis cameo, but, when alls said and done, the overly quick pace and mistake of not using much of the cast leaves the film struggling to keep things fun. Especially when the film decides Brad Pitt's melodramatic love life is more entertaining that the film's heists. Overall, 2 out of 6.
    Ocean's Thirteen brings the series back from the dead by actual having heists and using the talented cast. The new players are a welcome edition, even though the film feels like a rehashing of the first. 4.5 out of 6.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Cinema Wins and Cinema Sins: Volume 7

CINEMA WINS
- Director Robert Rodriguez annouced several of the new project he wants to begin working on. First up are two sequels to Machete. The first sequel, Machete Kills, will feature a trailer for the third film, Machete Kills Again... In Space! The film is said to feature "space babes and a lightsaper-like weapon" His other project is the long talked about Sin City 2: A Dame to Kill For. Rodriguez has stated that the film could start filming as early as this year, with the film involving two new stories written by Frank Miller. He stated he also wants to remake both Fire and Ice and Heavy Metal.

- Relativity Media has picked up the rights to make the long-awaited Voltron movie. They have taken over for Atlas Entertainment (Get Smart). A win because it Voltron.

- After Kenneth Branagh was reveled not to be return as the director of Thor 2, many wonder who would take over the Asgardian-reigns. Now, we know that Brain Kirk will be Thor 2's director. Kirk previous claims to fame include directing episodes of Dexter, Boardwalk Empire and Game of Thrones. It was also stated that the sequel may spend more time on Asgard than the first film. Thor 2 is set to be released on July, 26, 2013. In other Marvel news, both Doctor Strange and The Guardians of the Galaxy have been reveled as the next possible Marvel series.

- The world of DC Comics films have some news this week as well. The Man of Steel has added to it's cast Kevin Costner as Jonathan Kent, Diane Lane as Martha Kent and Laurence Fishburne as Perry White. Also, the first photo of Harvey Cavill as Superman as well as Anne Hathaway as Catwoman from The Dark Knight Rises were released on line this week.

CINEMA SINS
- Reese Witherspoon has signed on to star in Walt Disney Pictures's Wish List. Witherspoon will play a woman who, when she was ten, tossed a coin into a fountain and made ten wishes, that now, after 15 years, are starting to come true all at once. A sin, because the writer Randy Mayem Singer's other film, is Tooth Fairy.

- The cast of The Expendables 2 has expanded this past week as both Chuck Norris and John Travolta may be staring in the sequel, which is being released on August 17, 2012. A sin, because, well, The Expendables just wasn't very good.

- Director Tim Hill is in talks to direct to new movies. The first is a remake of Short Circuit. While Short Circuit is not a bad film, Tim Hill is a bad director, placing the remake in the Sins catagory. Hill's other film is going to be the epic adaptation of children's book masterpiece, Walter the Farting Dog. With a title like that, you just can't go right!

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Back to the 1940s: "LA Noire and Back to the Future: The Game" Review

INTRODUCTIONS: LA Noire is Rockstar Studios newest game. The gmae follows Cole Phelps, an LAPD detective as he solves cases and catches criminals. Back to the Future: The Game follow Marty McFly as he goes back to the 1930s to rescue Doc Brown. This reviews the PS3 versions.

THE REVIEWS: LA Noire is obviously drastically different from Rockstar's other games Red Dead Redemption and Grand Theft Auto 4. In those games, for the most part, you played what many people would think as "bad guys'. In LA Noire, you play as a police officer, which is clearly a welcome change. Long story short this game is good. Noire does an expert job at actually making you feel like a detective. The graphics, especially the famous face animation, is fantastic. The characters are likable and the ending is quite possibly Rockstar's best yet.
    However, the game does have some major flaws. Like, even though the characters are good, they are definately the least memorable protagonists in a Rockstar game. The game may also be Rockstar's shortest. With 21 cases to do, all at varying lengths, the games, while a decent size, does feel a little short. However, that may be because the sandbox in this game is not very interesting. There just isn't enough to do. The game also has problem with variety. The game tends to have you work basically the smae cases over and over with only minor differences.
    Back to the Future: The Game was somewhat cleverly broken up into 5 downloadable chunks. The good news is that the game feels like the long-lost fouth movie. It's every bit as smart, funny and exciting as the other three films. However, gameplay-wise, the game can be a little to boring and repetitive to satasfiy some gamers.

THE VERDICTS: LA Noire is one of the most gripping and fun game when it's good. However, when it's bad, it's boring and lazy. Overall, it's THEATER-WORTHY. Back to the Future: The Game captures the spirit of the movies very well, but faulters when it comes to gameplay. Overall, it's Recommended (Just Not At Full Price).